As moms we naturally give our bests to others whether its to our kids, our husband, our friends our bosses, we tend to put ourselves last. This is not a bad thing, as Christians we are called to serve others. (See Mark 10:43-45, Luke 22:27, Proverbs 31;10-31)
Yet because we are human we can feel burned out, or used. Sometimes as moms we can feel like we are not truly appreciated; that a maid or a cook or a taxi service would get as much gratitude as we do from our families. Those are times we need to sit back and remember why we do what we do. We need to remember those wet oatmeal kisses are worth more than gold and that the sparkle in a child's eye can sometimes say thank you better than his words. These are the times we need to look at the blessings we have been given and remind ourselves to be thankful for them. In the words of the Veggie Tales "A thankful heart is a happy heart.I'm thankful for for what I have it's an easy place to start."
That said these feelings of discontentment and of being unappreciated can be staved by not only caring for our families but for ourselves as well. A wise woman gave me some wonderful advice when oldest daughter was born and I decided to be a stay at home mom. She told me find a hobby or activity- something that was mine- so when the kids grew up and moved out I would not feel useless.
I have also learned over the years that I have learned from various sources that there are three aspects of ourselves that we need to care for and nurture. They are our physical, mental/intellectual and spiritual well being.
Physical well being is our health, nutrition, fitness, hygiene and appearance. By appearance I mean we feel better about ourselves if we look our best. It can be as simple has having our face washed,our teeth and hair brushed and clean clothes on (even ifthe baby has spit up on you three times in the last hour.) I don't mean we have to put on make-up if we normally wouldn't or wear designer clothes. My mom once told me about a woman who showered and changed her clothes and did her hair everyday at 3:00 before her husband got home from work and her kids returned from school. It not only made her feel good about herself it also helped her relationship with her husband because she felt it was important for her husband to come home to a wife who looked as nice as the house did instead of to a slob in sweats. Sometimes just taking an extra 10 minutes in the shower or a coat of nail polish on our finger or toenails is all we need to feel better about ourselves.
Moms and dads who are primarily at home with kids,especially young kids who don't speak well, can feel like their brains have gone to mush. This is why we need to take care of our mental or intellectual health. Make it a priority to exercise your brain. Try to read at least a few times a week. It doesn't have to be classic literature to use your mind, a magazine or web article will work. (Look, you're doing it now.) Word games or even video puzzle games can stimulate your problem solving or critical thinking skills. You can also take a class or try a new hobby. My library has many programs throughout the year for various age groups. Although it doesn't usually work out for me to take an adult class, taking my kids benefits me as well. By taking my youngest to lap sit story time I get one-on-one time with my son, the focus is on my child rather than a mommy gossip group (not all mom groups are like this I just had bad experience in the past so I tend to steer clear of these)yet I have a brief chance to interact with other adults. Or when I take my three year old to the story time where care-givers are not required I have 30 minutes of me time at the library to look for books, read magazines or chat with the other moms.
Humans are spiritual creatures. As a Christian it is important for me to care for my faith by studying God's word, worshiping God, fellowship with other Christians, and serving the Lord and others. I encourage you to do what is necessary to care for your spiritual side.
Wow, I realize this is a long post,but that is because I feel it is very important. Please share your thought or ideas on how to pamper yourself. On up-coming Fridays I will post ideas of how to pamper and care for yourself.
No comments:
Post a Comment